[Subtitles by danielsangeo]
Hmm. I guess I shouldn't
do that. I might need it.
I mean, I might not. Things
could just calm down from here
and--dammit, I can't do this optimism shit!
I didn't become a scientist
by ignoring observed evidence.
There's gotta be something--
Oh, is this a gate that opens?
No! This is as solid as all hell!
What's even the point of this?
That's a tunnel! This could be what I--
There's no current; what
does this turbine even...
Do I spin with it or get--
That's great! Wasn't so sure
I was going to have that.
As far as hiding places go...
But...it has other problems.
Huh. That was better than a
lot of them. I didn't even die.
This is a lot more promising.
Could I have an actual hideout this time?
I mean they're not going to
follow me through the water...
Get the fuck--AAAAAAAH! MY EYES!
AM I GOING TO SEE AGAIN?!
Yeah... I can still see...
I'm going to end up like Ted!
He wore sunglasses all the time;
didn't matter what was happening.
He was also a chain-smoker,
but he did good work.
YEAH! I'M NOT IMAGINING IT!
THEY CAME IN FROM THE SKY!
[CP emergency beacon whistles]
"If you'd like to make a call,
please die before dialing--"
Just because you can't move doesn't mean
you should sneak up on people like that!
IF I WANT HELP SLOWLY RIPPING MY
OWN HEAD OFF, I'LL ASK FOR IT!
I'm running a little low here!
Oh, what the hell? This is a
different caliber for this gun!
[manhack whines]
Well, I'm almost spent;
[manhack whines]
I don't have time for--
[manhack whines]
Okay, FINE!
Okay, now I can think for ONE SECOND!
Dammit! At Black Mesa, all the pistols
and machine guns used the same ammo!
What's wrong with these cops?
They just have so much ammo,
they don't care.
And I've gone in circles again!
What about the sky? Anyone still there?
No wonder they're on my ass
if I'm going in circles!
I missed the first day of fugitive class!
But the thing is I've been following
the ONLY PATH in front of me!
So I guess the first lesson
of being a fugitive is
DON'T TAKE ADVICE FROM A FUCKING COP
ON HOW TO GET AWAY FROM THE COPS!
It doesn't seem to bother the tongue thing.
I'm still surprised they're
not from a swamp planet.
I'm not even sure how to
describe where they're from.
Good enough. I'm covering my ears.
That'd be good at concerts: set
off explosives behind the stage
at the peak of the song to
really bring the bass home.
Bum-bum-bum-bum-poooorrrrfffshhh !
Ah. This is not the fun corner.
Yep. I'll leave the skull. I'm not greedy.
Why is this venting so much?
Is this preventing the city from blowing up?
Now every time my face hurts,
I'm going to think of Kleiner.
Why is this barred off? This metal
looks too new to be a dungeon.
Ha! Lambda, huh? Maybe I'm
not the only street physicist.
Okay, boarded off.
That's what I want to see.
That means I'm the only
person...that comes down here.
Really, I'd like it if I
could nail them back up, but--
Oh! Somebody stashed some ammo here.
And themself, just to be safe.
Boy, I can see why they caged this off;
wouldn't want somebody to get bored.
This IS a pretty sweet hiding spot
though I'm not sure that matters.
It's those damned floating paparazzi bots.
As soon as they found me, the
police were on me in seconds.
Maybe that's why the cops are so dumb:
They just get orders where to go
and shoot anything that moves.
Oh here we go. This looks promising.
You could hide some bodies in here.
Maybe that's why this is caged off.
MIKE: Let's go! They've got tacos!
Guess it's their lunch break.
These new rounds fit. That's great.
Enjoy your tacos. I'll have
dessert here if you want some
though I'm not sure I have enough
for everybody. I sure hope so.
What was the point of any of this?!
Oh, shit! It's the taco truck!
OKAY, I GUESS I'D LIKE
SOME CHICKEN WITH LETTUCE!
UH, HARD SHELL, MEDIUM SALSA!
DAMMIT, I SAID MEDIUM SALSA!
THIS IS TOO HOT!
IT'S STILL TOO HOT! I'M CHANGING MY ORDER!
Dammit. More's going on
than what I'm seeing here.
They were completely ready for
me with their barrels of fun,
but then they jumped
into the trench with me.
Why would they give up their
tactical advantage that they set up?
The cops gunning for me are
NOT the same ones tracking me.
The intelligence divide is too big.
Once again, your kind adds
nothing to the discussion.
[manhack whines]
And don't even get me started on you.
That's really the problem,
though. These fucking bots!
Maybe not the saw-blade ones
but for sure the flash-bangers.
They've gotta stop tracking me.
I don't think these have trackers on them.
The data would be too noisy. They would
track every moving object in the city.
The flash-bangers transmit my location,
that's read by a computer,
which sends orders to the cops, who
have trouble not shooting themselves,
and that's it. There's no human
oversight at all! It's all on auto-pilot!
Wait, what the hell? Is this a dead end?
Then why have all the fencing and the
bars just to protect a bunch of rubble...?
I've got to be missing something. There
were five saw-bots trying to kill me and--
No, NO! I'm sick of this!
I'm going to bust open that pipe and
we're going to find some answers together,
because I'm not going back to the--
Oh wait. Shit. Air vent. Okay.
If this loops back, I'm
going to murder someone,
but I guess I've already done that.
Well, I feel like I'm learning
more. It's all automated.
It feels like the entire world is conspiring
against me because it actually is!
I forgot what I was thinking about.
JESUS CHRIST, THAT'S CLOSE!
[manhack whines]
Oh my god!
Okay, I guess those ARE dangerous
when there's...a million of them.
But that's true of anything. A Nerf bat'll
kill you if it's shoved down your esophagus!
They don't care which man they hack up?
I guess not! That's what
I was saying earlier!
Jeez, that's a lot of fuel barrels.
Good thing we had a firefight in here!
But yeah. That's the logic trap
I was slipping into a little bit.
There IS a conspiracy of
the whole world against me,
Because most people think--yeah,
great place for the pipe here.
Oh what? This is caged off?!
Okay, I don't feel like going into
monkey mode just yet. I'm sore.
But yeah, most people who think the world
is out to get them aren't that important;
it's just out to get
everybody and they're...there.
But I AM that important, so how do I know?
People think it's great being me and...it
is, but I have problems they don't.
Well, the ones that aren't dead.
Okay, how is anyone even
supposed to get in here?
There's nothing up here. Why even...?
Okay, it must come in
through the bottom here.
I'd call this bad design but I
don't know what this room is.
I can't reach this. The walls are wet...
All right! Monkey mode it is!
Well I'll say this: In all my time in
the drain here, I haven't seen one rat.
Maybe the manhacks aren't meant
to kill people specifically,
but are just there to kill anything,
so we let them loose in the
city to see what happens.
I haven't seen any dogs or cats either.
This is a pain in the ass with this armor.
So yeah. It looks like Ninja Turtles had
it right. Wouldn't have guessed that.
We have MOUSERS. They're just
flying and don't look as cool.
I'd actually be kind of honored if...
Why is this barred off?
It looks like solid steel.
Oh, what? Is the entrance at
the bottom? Yeah, probably.
Well, I think MOUSERS were the only
thing Ninja Turtles was right about.
And Dimension X, sort of.
But no mutants, no robotic foot
soldiers. That's what makes this reality.
[underwater "What the hell?"]
Okay, that looks welded shut, so
what the hell is going on here?!
What is this place?! It's a fucking
Mario pipe maze in a flooded chamber
right next to a fuel depot, and
it's ALL CAGED OFF, because...
I bet the police right now
know exactly where I am
but they can't figure out
how to get here either.
Okay, THAT looks like an exit. THAT
looks normal, so let's start from there.
These bars are blocking the view. I'm
going to get a better look from over here.
Okay, yeah, there's that tunnel.
So that's how I get over there.
Never mind the fact that I can't get
into the tunnel because it's too high up.
Am I missing something?
Was there another ladder?
No! It's all covered in a steel
mesh! How am I supposed to...?
Okay, wait wait. Wait.
There's a ladder there...
So if I get through the tunnel...
I come up the ladder...but that's on
THIS side. How do I get on THAT side?
Maybe I could lunge towards the edge but...
I can't make that jump directly!
Maybe this was a mistake...